ey there,
You’ve probably seen this before.
Your kid’s in the cage or on the field. A coach offers some feedback, and instead of making eye contact and soaking it in, they shut down. Maybe they mumble, “I know,” or just nod while looking off somewhere else.
You’re watching from the side thinking: “He clearly doesn’t know; that’s why the coach is talking to him!”
Look, it’s not just your kid. This is really common. And it’s become one of the biggest things holding players back today.
It’s not mechanics.
It’s not strength.
It’s not effort.
It’s how they receive coaching
The Real Problem Nobody Talks About
So many kids today struggle when it comes to taking feedback.
They get triggered.
They get defensive.
They stop listening.
They avoid eye contact.
But to be a better teammate, student, partner, and professional someday.
They think being corrected means they did something wrong.
But that’s not what feedback is. Not in sports, not in life.
Feedback is a gift. And learning how to receive it is one of the most important skills your child can develop.
Not just to play better baseball.
So why is this so much harder for today’s generation of kids?
There are a few big reasons:
1. More praise, less correction.
Over the past 20 years, parenting and teaching trends have leaned heavily toward protecting kids from failure and emphasizing self-esteem over resilience. While well-intentioned, this has created a generation of kids who associate correction with criticism, not growth.
Studies have shown that overpraising can actually lead to fear of failure. If kids grow up hearing “Great job!” for everything, they start to believe mistakes mean something is wrong with them, not just their effort or approach. That mindset makes them fragile when challenged.
2. Social media pressure.
Today’s athletes grow up in a world of highlight reels. Instagram, YouTube, and TikTok show constant perfection, flawless swings, clean plays, and walk-off hits.
So when they strike out, get corrected, or struggle during training, it feels like they’re behind. The fear of being judged, embarrassed, or seen as “less than” is real, and it messes with their ability to stay open to coaching.
3. Decreased face-to-face communication.
A lot of kids simply haven’t had as much practice communicating with adults face-to-face. Whether it’s because of devices, remote school, or social habits, many kids are less comfortable with eye contact, tone of voice, and the emotional “muscle” it takes to hear tough things from someone in authority.
A coach saying “Try it this way” can feel way more intense than it actually is, because that skill of receiving feedback hasn’t been developed.
The Domino Effect of Being Uncoachable
If a kid can’t handle correction, they hit a ceiling; fast!
Because growth requires feedback.
It’s how we fix small habits before they become big problems. It’s how we turn good into great.
When players can’t receive coaching:
- They avoid challenges
- They focus only on outcomes
- They fear mistakes
- They struggle to build trust with mentors
And it spills over into everything: School, relationships, future careers.
We like to teach our kids that they don’t win or lose. They win or learn. But if they can’t learn, they stop growing.
What We Do to Build Coachable Athletes
At Paradigm, we spend a lot of time helping young athletes improve how they respond to coaching, not just what they do on the field.
Here’s how we do it:
1. We Coach the Mental Game
We don’t ignore the flinchy body language or the “I know” responses.
We talk about it.
Sometimes I’ll say:
“Hey, I’m not calling you out. I’m calling you up. This isn’t about being wrong. It’s about getting better.”
That reframe builds trust. And trust builds coachability.
2. We Normalize Mistakes
We tell every player: “If you’re not making mistakes, you’re not pushing yourself.”
So when a kid messes up and wants to hide or apologize, we say:
“Good. You’re trying something. Let’s figure out what happened and go again.”
Mistakes are not the enemy. They’re the data.
3. We Focus on Process Over Results
We work with a lot of kids who’ve learned to obsess over stats. Did I get a hit? Did I strike out? Did I make the play?
At Paradigm, we shift the mindset.
We ask:
Did you get 1% better today?
Did you take a risk?
Did you bounce back after a mistake?
Those are wins. And those wins stack up.
Why This Matters (Even After the Last Inning)
One day, your kid’s baseball career will end. Could be after Little League, could be in college, maybe even pro ball.
But how they respond to feedback?
That’ll shape everything that comes next.
- How they handle schoolwork
- How they grow in their job
- How they communicate in relationships
- How they deal with challenges
The skill of receiving feedback, without getting defensive, without shutting down, is a superpower.
And we can help them develop it.
What You Can Do to Help
If you want to reinforce this at home, here are a few ways to do it:
- Model it yourself. Let your kid see you take feedback. “You’re right, I didn’t handle that well. I’ll do better next time.” That kind of leadership sticks.
- Ask better questions. Instead of “Did you win?” try “What did you learn?” or “What’s one thing you’re working on?”
- Let us help. We coach this stuff every single day, and we’re pretty dang good at it.
Final Thought
Every player wants to hit bombs, throw gas, and make plays. But the ones who go furthest aren’t just the most athletic.
They’re the most coachable.
Let’s teach our kids how to take feedback, grow from it, and love the process of improvement. That’s a skill that will last them a lifetime.
Let’s build athletes, and humans, who don’t flinch when someone tries to help them.
Let’s build ones who lean in.
See you in the gym,
Joey Wolfe
Founder, Paradigm Sport
PS – If your kid could use a little nudge in the right direction, we’d love to help.
👉 Try 1 FREE week of unlimited Performance Training. No strings, no pressure. Just a chance to get better in an environment that builds confidence and coachability.
Send us a quick message or swing by. We’ll take care of the rest.
