ou never realize how strong you are until being strong is the only choice you have.”
— Bob Marley
Like all of you, my entire world was turned upside down three weeks ago. What started off as a problem on the other side of the globe, has torn through our planet like a vicious tornado, threatening everyone in its path.
Two dates that will be etched in my brain forever are February 28, 2007 and March 16, 2020. The former is the day we left my brother’s oncologist’s office where we were told that my brother had less than 6 weeks to live. The latter is the date Santa Cruz County issued the Shelter in Place due to COVID-19.
The fear and uncertainty in both instances only fed into my anxiety. I couldn’t imagine how my family would be able to carry on without Vince; I just couldn’t fathom a world without my brother in it. How could this happen? How would my family get through this? Those exact same questions and feelings all came rushing back to me 3 weeks ago.
On the night of March 17th, I found myself running on the beach late at night, trying to collect my thoughts. I hadn’t done that since 2006, when my brother was diagnosed with cancer. That was how I coped with everything back then. I guess I hoped I would find some clarity out on that beach. The thought of having to lay-off people that I cared deeply about because I no longer had work for them weighed heavily on me.
Now here I am, in a position that I am always talking to our young baseball players about. Important life lessons that the game of baseball can teach them if they are willing and able to let it.
Fear. Overcoming fear. How do you respond when your back is against the wall? All of these lessons were staring me right in the face. How am I going to respond?
How did this happen? How did 5 ½ years of hard work get torn apart in less than a week? All questions I didn’t have answers too. Questions I still don’t have answers too. But here is what I do know. As much as I compare the fear and uncertainty I’m feeling to my brother’s death, the biggest difference with this situation is that we are all in this together. It is not just about me and my family. It is about all of us. All of us are being impacted by COVID-19. Many of us are being impacted financially, some of us physically, but all of us are being impacted emotionally and psychologically.
When this all came to a head in mid-March my focus was very much centered on Paradigm, our employees and all of our members. Our business was threatened, which meant everyone that was a part of our Paradigm community was threatened too. Yet as each week passes my concerns grow deeper. It is not just about the economic impact it will have on all of us. I am now concerned with my parent’s health and well-being. The health, safety and well-being of all of our members, staff, family and friends.
Things are moving quickly, and as much as I try to get in front of them, I feel like I can’t. I feel like every decision I make is testing my character, my decision-making ability, my communication and above all, my leadership skills. I am being forced to grow into the leader that I’ve always wanted to be. I have joked that 2020 is the first year (and probably the last) that I created a vision board. There are a lot of great things on my vision board. But there are two things that stand out during this crisis. The first is just one word, Leadership. The second is a quote by Gary Grant, it reads “I pretended to be somebody I wanted to be until finally I became that person. Or he became me.” In the past three weeks I have been forced to become the leader that I have tried to be for the past 5 ½ years.
That’s the thing about crisis and loss, even in the darkness they reveal moments of reflection, beauty and growth. Losing my brother was the catalyst for me opening Paradigm Sport and I can honestly say had that not happened there would not be a Paradigm Sport. The same has held true through this crisis. Among all the loss, sadness and uncertainty, we have seen neighbors connecting and caring for one another for the first time. Our members have stepped up in ways we could not have even imagined. Many of you are still paying your full membership. We have received e-mails and calls of encouragement and business advice. We have people sharing our online platforms and donating to Venmo so that we can help support those who were laid off. The overwhelming support we have received from our members and the community at large has been heartwarming and is something that we will never forget. In addition, this crisis has forced all of us to slow down and spend more time with our family. The roads are not as crowded, which means the air quality is improving. I have been talking about creating an online business for three years now. This crisis forced me to pivot quickly and start an online platform virtually overnight. I signed-up to help at the local foodbank and to give blood through the Red Cross; both things that I have talked about doing but have not made the time for.
I believe if we all do our part not only will be beat this thing, we will come out the other side stronger because of it. In order to do that we all have a role to play. I have thought long and hard about what my role is. I believe my responsibility is to keep my family, my staff and my community STRONG throughout all of this. That is why I have committed to show up every day at 12:00 to workout WITH all of you. Seeing each of you on that screen everyday feeds my soul and gives me the energy I need to persevere. I hope Zach and I are giving you that same energy in return. We will continue to do that until this thing is over. My other responsibility is to take the shelter in place seriously and to continue practicing social distancing. With all that our first responders, nurses and doctors are being put through, we have a responsibility to do all that we can to remain healthy and safe so that we do not add to that burden.
Although I’m still anxious about what the future holds and know that the worst is yet to come, I feel at peace with what we are doing to keep Paradigm moving forward during this time. We are literally taking it one day at time, letting our Core Values guide us, and putting our members needs in front of our own to try and serve you the best we can during this tumultuous time. If we continue to do that, I believe everything will work out as it should.
It is safe to say that we are all facing one of the most challenging times of our life. We still have a long hard road ahead of us. I believe how we show up for one another during a time like this says a lot about our character. We have an opportunity to grow not only as a community but as a world. We are in this together and my hope is that this challenging time unites us all.
In Health,
Joey
